Saturday, November 10, 2012

Where the name of this blog came from :-)

How dare I.

Live through it all.

How dare I be after my time.

I should have left the day I fell asleep

Though I've yet to waken from this curse

There is something so empty about a child out of reach

Something .......

Nothing I feel

Nothing I taste

Nothing here in my death that I live

It's hard to explain to the living the nothing I feel

The desire to convince just isn't there

There is nothing I want nor a thing that I need

I am blind and deaf

I've seen and heard too much

More than what perhaps one is meant to

I wasn't equipped for such evils

I learned just the same

Words really mean nothing

How when there is no expectation

could the disappointment be so grand

I've let me down ...again

I can't depend on me for a thing

I'm just not there

At least not for myself in these times

I need to get up to get out

Feel some sunlight and sweat

I am paralyzed by something

A big nothing world

what actually happened?

was there a time when something was there?

When somebody cared?

I know there was

Yet somehow lost the details

The clarity..myself

On what day did it happen

Where was I...asleep

So hard to awake when you're not there

draws me in nothing

Won't let me go..myself perhaps

Strength only last for a day

Then back to all that doesn't matter

Slumber again..still..until death

Hate deficient in my world

Reason I could never relate

Birds of no alike feathers

In the skies I occupied

Is that why I retreated to the nest?

Is that why I stayed?

perhaps I never really left

Nor did I need to I yet

I can't change them or make them see

I can't save them ..not even me

It used to be they wouldn't listen

Now I'm unable to speak

I'll be awake real soon

Ready and willing

Stronger than life

I'll dare to be

despite them all

Failure to rediscover dreams

To recall if ever they were

Creation of new dreams

Dare to be Free of the Slumber

Strength of Me

I died that day

Whenever that was

I'll reinvent myself once again

I've got a few more times left

Before the final Slumber

My personal thoughts used to be a run on sentence. Now,they are nothing but (thought) fragments.